Tuesday, April 25, 2017

Home Invasion Adventure

The dog is always happy to see me in the morning, but not the kind of happy that forces her to get up off the sofa and greet me. Not at first, of course, because she knows the ritual.

 First I get coffee, then I  spend way too long trying to wake up Zoe, THEN I take the dog out.

This morning it goes very easily and after Zoe slips into the shower I walk to the front door and don't say a word.

Mia gets herself off the sofa, stretches into downward dog and then lets out a yawn bark and runs to the door. I clip on her leash, flip on the outside light and open the door.

I take one step outside the house and giant brown fuzzy spider that looks to be almost the size of my hand jumps down out of nowhere (out of somewhere but I refuse to look).

It scuttles by me and marches directly to the threshold of the doorway as though it had been waiting all this time for me to let it in.

No sir, I say, and think to scoot it away with my foot but seriously I'm not that brave so I stomp my foot and the spider just stands there.

 The dog does nothing.

I am too sleepy to think of any solution beyond throwing coffee on the spider which seems like a recklessly violent response so the dog and I just walk away and leave Mr. Spider to his pre-dawn home invasion adventures.