At the mall I ignore their request to "pretend I didn't know them" and stuck to them like glue, trailing them quietly (it killed me), standing at the back of awkwardly dark, loud stores cheered on silently by my facebook friends.
I was on my Best Behavior.
For an Entire Day.
Now, home and back to normal, I feel rested up enough to torture her like a good mother should, especially now that she has no witnesses or allies.
"Zoe! You forgot to put sweetner in my coffee!"
I get up off the sofa's warm hug and walk to the kitchen where she says (after a sensible pause) "I didn't make you coffee, Mom..."
I shake two packets into my hot coffee with my back to her and remind her sweetly, "You're right. You didn't even offer to make your sweet mother coffee. And now you feel AWFUL for not doing more for me after ALL I've done for you. I *forgive* you."
She rolls her eyes and I kiss her on the forehead before returning to the warm deep sofa, planning my next move.